When you and your spouse aren’t getting along, should you seek counseling or go talk to a Chapel Hill divorce lawyer? It’s a common question, and many people have a tough time deciding when to stop working on their marriages. To answer it, you’ll need to discuss your options with your spouse and be extremely honest with yourself.
Talking to a Chapel Hill Divorce Lawyer
Even if you’re not sure about getting a divorce, you might find it helpful to talk to a Chapel Hill divorce lawyer. An attorney can explain the big picture on divorce in North Carolina, how custody agreements work if you have kids, and tell you whether you could expect to receive alimony from your spouse if you divorce.
Since finances are often in turmoil during a divorce, a Chapel Hill divorce lawyer might also recommend that you talk to a financial planner or tax adviser before making your decision. He or she might also recommend a local counselor or therapist that you and your spouse can talk to about your marriage in order to make the best decision possible.
Counseling or Divorce?
In some cases, one spouse can’t (or chooses not to) forgive the other for something they’ve done in the marriage, such as cheating or emotional abuse. In other marriages, resentment builds over time and is hard to break down. With counseling, some couples can repair the damage that’s been done; others cannot.
Most therapists will tell you that counseling only works if both parties are committed to staying married. You can’t force someone to stay in a marriage if they’re not happy, so if you’re considering counseling, make sure that both you and your spouse have chosen to put in the work required for a successful outcome.
If you’re the victim of domestic violence, talk to a Chapel Hill divorce lawyer as soon as you can. Your lawyer can connect you with the resources you need to stay safe and begin rebuilding your life.
Ultimately, the decision to seek counseling or get a divorce is up to both of you. As long as both partners embrace the idea, counseling can be a good choice. However, if one only gives it a half-hearted try or is emotionally involved with someone else, talking to a Chapel Hill divorce lawyer may be your only option.
