You’re divorcing your ex, not his or her family—but what does that really mean? Is it okay to keep in touch with your in-laws, or even try to maintain the same relationships you had with them before the divorce?
Many people do continue to have relationships with their former in-laws (particularly those with kids), and that’s completely normal. Even if you don’t have kids, it’s fine to maintain your relationships as long as everyone involved is comfortable.
Not all splits are amicable, and that may affect your ability to keep up relationships with your former in-laws. If members of your ex’s family are not friendly with you, or if they try to interfere with your divorce or your relationship with your children, let your Raleigh divorce lawyer know right away.
Test the Waters First
Most people aren’t sure whether their in-laws want to maintain contact with them, and that uncertainty usually goes both ways.
First, be sure you won’t be making any waves by asking your ex if he or she has a problem with you continuing your relationships. You’re not necessarily asking because you care whether your ex is uncomfortable. You’re asking because you care about his or her family, and if he or she has a problem it’s likely to make them unhappy.
As long as your ex is okay with you keeping in touch with your former in-laws, reach out to them. Call your ex-mother-in-law and explain that you feel they’re a part of your life and you’d like them to stay in it. However, you’ll need to prepare yourself for the event that they feel keeping in touch with you is inappropriate. Some families might believe that their first loyalty is to their own, and your divorce may be the end of your contact with them.
Keeping the Relationships Alive for the Kids
In some cases, you’ll still need to keep in touch with your ex’s family during and after your divorce because there are children involved. If your ex’s sister picks up your kids from school, or they spend every other Sunday morning with Grandma and Grandpa, you won’t want to interfere with your kids’ relationships.
While they may be angry with you over the divorce, let them know that you and your kids value them and that you’d like to keep those family ties strong. Eventually, they’ll come around.
When to Contact Your Raleigh Divorce Lawyer
There’s no need for you to maintain a relationship with your ex-in-laws if they aren’t as friendly as you’d like (which probably affected you during your marriage). Some in-laws are extremely unfriendly—and if their behavior affects your divorce, it might be time to call your Raleigh divorce lawyer.
If your ex’s family attempts to drag your kids into your divorce, or if they interfere with visitation times, call your Raleigh divorce lawyer immediately. Your lawyer can help you take legal action to prevent your kids from suffering because of your ex-in-laws.
