There’s no easy way to say it, but you’re done with your marriage and you want a divorce. You may be looking for (or already talking to) a Raleigh divorce lawyer, you’ve figured out whether you can afford it and you’re ready to take this big step.
There’s just one problem: telling your spouse you want a divorce can be tough. So what do you do?
How to talk to your spouse about divorce
Telling your spouse you want a divorce might be the hardest part of the whole process. The good news is that once you’ve made yourself clear, you can start moving forward with your life.
One of the most important things to remember is that what you say is as important as how you say it. You’re setting the stage for the rest of the divorce process when you break the news to your spouse, and if you’re like most people, you want the entire process to go as smoothly as possible.
- Be kind. Even if you’re angry, showing kindness is the best way to tell your spouse you want a divorce. Be willing to listen to what your spouse has to say about getting a divorce, and don’t argue – it’s not a competition, you’re simply stating your feelings.
- Don’t defend your choice. If you send the message that it’s a subject up for debate, a debate is what you’ll get. If you’re certain that you want a divorce, stick to it. Don’t say that you and your spouse might be able to work things out if you know you cannot.
- Choose the time and the place wisely. Taking your spouse out to a candlelit dinner might not send the right message; instead, find a private place where you can spend uninterrupted time talking about your divorce.
As you’re telling your spouse you want a divorce, remain kind but firm. Let your spouse know that you’re prepared to work together for your whole family’s best interests. Be prepared for your spouse’s questions, but also let him or her know that you don’t have to talk about everything right now – and throughout the discussion, maintain that you’ll be fair during the entire divorce process.
